David Wagoner, an American poet and former Chancellor of the Academy of American Poets, penned an
amazing piece called “Lost,” based on the advice elders give to young Native Americans should they become lost in the forest.
The first line is “Stand still,” and the last is “The
forest knows where you are. You must let it find
you.” Stepping away from so many commitments and
“standing still” gave me a chance to breathe and “let
the forest find me.” As someone who was “stuck” in
my business as a professional speaker with stiff, bor-derline-preachy messages, audiences that didn’t “fit,”
and personal expectations that weren’t coming true,
standing still provided breathing room and hope.
The forest found me in the form of Jon Kabat
Zinn’s Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction, where
I learned to meditate; The Hudson Institute, where
I learned how to coach and be coached with heart
and backbone; and Awesome Women and Heartland,
where I found collegial communities of thought leaders (versus doers). The forest encouraged me to read
voraciously and invited me to journal daily. Standing
still helped me grow stronger, from the inside out.
The following three guidelines can help you feel
more comfortable and confident in stepping back,
standing still and then moving forward:
“U.B.U., I.M.E.” According to NSA member Jana
Stanfield, a speaker-singer-songwriter known as “The
Queen of Heavy Mental,” it doesn’t help anyone
if we try to be someone else, even if it is the “best
someone else.” We need to be who we are.
Book “me time” for learning, laughing and just
being. In the past five years, I’ve camped near Lake
Superior, run a half-marathon in County Donegal,
Ireland, spent five weeks writing in Santa Barbara,
experienced the power of monosyllabic communication with teenage boys and the pleasure of facials.
Ask one really great question each day. In hindsight, I’ve laughed about my knack for finding very
difficult ways to do things. Now, I start each new
experience by asking myself if I’m making something hard or easy, fun or painful.
Today, I’m a happier, more fulfilled coach who
truly helps transform others, a consultant who focuses on clients’ growth, and a speaker who is there
for the audience. I comfortably recommit to learning, to serving and to leading inside NSA, to the
privilege of the platform and, perhaps most important, to those audiences whom I can authentically
help connect, reflect and grow. Inspired by David
Whyte’s poem, “The Opening of Eyes,” I have accomplished this by listening to the forest and standing on solid ground. (See sidebar.)
I share my story and this poem, hoping you’ll explore the benefits gained from slowing down, stepping down and breathing down into the inner well
of true meaning. The ways I might share my voice,
in service to the growth and changes of others, has
never felt more profound. The privilege of the platform is more real to me than it ever was. It can be
for you, too.
Betsy Buckley, APR, is an award-winning
stock broker, deal-making corporate
executive, global chief marketing officer and
serial entrepreneur. Founder of What
Matters, she also is a speaker, facilitator,
coach and consultant who helps organizations build their
revenues and their reputations. For more information,
contact Betsy at betsyb@what-matters.com or visit www.
what-matters.com.
