Speaker - November 2008

Quips, tips and parting shots
Back-of-the-Room Barbie

It’s amazing what I will do when I should be doing something else. Today I found myself on Mattel^®’s Barbie^® Web site. (Oh, don’t tell me you’re always on task.)

So, anyway, there I was slack-jawed, looking at pictures of Hard Rock Café Barbie, The Interview Barbie (I’m guessing she gets the job by the way she’s dressed) and Cabaret Dancer Barbie. I simply had to read the description of Cabaret Barbie after I saw the photo. This is what it said: “Cabaret Dancer Barbie doll is dressed to thrill in a daring silver outfit designed to show off those agile legs.”

WHAT? Did they get that copy mixed up with a Las Vegas night club? NSA, it’s time to take over Barbie and give her a real platform.

I propose Motivational Speaker Barbie. Of course, she would own a Dream House and a convertible ( proving that, yes, speaking is a lucrative business). And she’ll be perfect for back-of-the-room sales, and easier to schlep than those bulky books we sell.

Motivational Speaker Barbie would be a clean, conservative, articulate Barbie—a savvy businesswoman. Pull her string and she’ll say “Would you like to sign up for my e-zine, blog,

wall to stop the madness. Then, he said, “Now let’s hear what she has to say.” I pulled the string and she spit out words that sounded like Alvin the Chipmunk on speed. You can only imagine the therapy I required.

Pull her string and she’ll say “Would you like to sign up

for my e-zine, blog, podcast and 36-set CD package?”

podcast and 36-set CD package titled ‘Barbie Talks to Bureaus—A Hit-and-Miss Interview’”?

Maybe that’s Chatty Cathy who had a string on her back. I remember now how I would incessantly pull her string until my brother yanked her from my little hands, and banged her against the

Imagine NSA and Mattel working together to create Motivational Speaker

Barbie, a meaningful toy
that teaches and inspires,
not thrills and titillates.
This toy would bring in
sales that would make the
“Fun Meter” pale in com-
parison. There would be
no unsafe manufacturing practices,
and Barbie would be made in the

USA, thereby saving us money on lead paint. (See Enterprise, one of NSA’s competencies.)

Next, we’ll work on getting Skipper into NSA’s Youth Program.

Speaker and comedian Molly Cox inspires thousands to use humor in health-care, business and education to balance their daily lives by laughing at even life’s most absurd circumstances. Molly is the co-author of Improvise This! How to Think on Your Feet so You Don’t Fall on Your Face, and the CEO of Strongcoffeeink, a gift line for women. For more information, visit www. mollyspeaks.com or contact her at mcoxziton@comcast.com.